Careless whisper

It was the day of our little Taitung Carp Mountain neighborhoods twice annual block party. It usually consisted of many covered dishes, a large tent, raffles and a karaoke stage. There were very few English language songs. Local luminaries showed up for windy political speeches. Excellent music performances were invited from all corners of the island. I kind of suspected that this would be my last block party. I had been enduring the classic “3C” restrictions – No communication, No contact, No coitus – for 3 years.
I made pasta and cookies for the dinner. I won a dish drier rack in the raffle. It seemed appropriate as I had washed a considerable number of dishes cooking.
The last event was the karaoke open mic. So, why was I up there singing Wu Bai's Tong Ku Da Ren and George Michael's Careless Whisper? I didn't even like the song.
It just seemed appropriate.
To understand the dynamic, you'd have to go back some years.

When we moved into the neighborhood, it was at the referral my wife, Kate. Her name was Rosa. Her husband, Michael and I got to be really good friends, having many things in common, carpentry, steel work, mechanics, a love of the great outdoors.

Michael pretty much kept to himself, unlike his wife who had her nose in everybody's business. She was all too often coming to our house with,“ Did you hear about so and so …,” and the conversation would fall into hushed whispers. There was a conspiratorial air about all of her conversations.

It was a standard device for winning someone's camaraderie, use gossip to create a false aura of trust, and then use it to bait and hook when there is something that you want. It wasn't too hard as Kate had very few friends, and was not well adjusted to social manipulations.

Jane and Jerome Chen were on the no tuition program. Father had died. Mother, Miss Chen, had 3 kids and no job. So, I suggested that we hire Miss Chen to do our house cleaning at 7pm, while we had classes. This way Kate and I would not have to do it at 9 pm. It would be a good way to provide an income for her. This worked very well for several months. She did an excellent job, was quiet as a moth. Then, Rose found out. Rose then used her influence on Kate. “My mother sits at home all day and feels useless. She could use the opportunity to get out. Also, she could use the money for her annual trip abroad. I helped you get started, here.“
None of that made sense to me. I knew Rosa was a busybody and expected the same from her mom. After several days of arguing which grew to serious bitterness, we were saddled with Old Rosa, who insinuated herself into our lives like a chigger until she became a mole for her malicious daughter, gathering information for the gossip mill.

So, with all the gossip flying from the Rosa network and from the friends who owned small businesses ( see “Heard it Through the Grapevine” ) and previous classmates, and 5 sisters our lives were ruled and misruled by misinformation.

Kate has never been able to understand that one cannot believe all of the gossip. Wisdom demands that we put a stop to it by dropping friends who thrive on gossip. Ultimately it was minor insecurities fed by gossip which are the undermining of many loving relations.